Ive decided to tell the whole...2 people who might ever read this about some of my retarded MSN conversations. Its not always my fault, so please dont blame me. If there are any private jokes that we find hilarious i will do my best to explain them but i might not even remember. Here goes.

[Matt is my bf]

[[Free]] I've only got to drown, or jump under a truck. And the sky will fall down and all the men will die. (Caits msn name)
[[ MIK ]] Im sure to put the SEX back into convicted sex criminal (My msn name)
CAIT: matt doesnt say shit to me
CAIT: i think hes scared
ME: lol he just doesnt talk much, plus u scare everyone u meey
ME: *meet
CAIT: XD
CAIT: i know :\
CAIT: at least i know ill never get stabbed
ME: maybe someone will get so scared of you, they'll stab you just so you leave them alone

(for this to make sense click the link)
[link]

CAIT: LOL
CAIT: we need some rapist glasses
ME: LOL i know right
ME: i might already have a pair....
CAIT: XDNICE!!!
CAIT: i know dad had some like those in the shed
ME: im gonna search op shops for them
CAIT: this dude does the same adds as like what JD does XD
ME: lol awesome!
ME: "excuse me old lady behind the counter, do you have any rapist glasses??"
CAIT: XDXDXDXD
CAIT: you should do that
CAIT: sound all posh
ME: i should wear a top hat when i ask, they look posh
CAIT: YES
CAIT: and one of those canes
CAIT: wear a suit
CAIT: with a fake beard
ME: and a monocle
ME: and a pipe
CAIT: it just went from silly to ridiculous in about 2 seconds flat
ME: doesnt it always?
ME: with us it does anyway

(Later that same day)

ME: i might be getting a ute
CAIT: awesome
CAIT: what kind
ME: idk yet
CAIT: get a hilux, they dont break
ME: neither do tonka trucks
CAIT: lool
CAIT: but you cant drive one of them around
ME: i could if i was 1 inch tall...
CAIT: unless you strap two of them to your feet and use them as skates
ME: yeh the big ones that everyone uses as sand hallers
CAIT: lol yeah
CAIT: its funny how on the adds they advertise tonka trucks as being hardy and not breaking when dropped, yet a 5 year old does the dropping and its not exactly that far to the ground
ME: thats like all commercials
ME: besides, who other than 5 yr olds would drop a tonka truck?
ME: besides a very intoxocated me and you
CAIT: idk
CAIT: LOL
CAIT: true that
CAIT: we gotta buy some rollerblades and skate behind the van at some point
CAIT: while it pulls us along
CAIT: on the roadtrip
ME: either rollerblades or a sled
CAIT: yes
CAIT: or like a random piece of furnature we find on the side of the road
CAIT: like a wheely chair
ME: lol yes
ME: a couch with wheels would be ideal
CAIT: yes
CAIT: i reckon
CAIT: whilst trying to make and eat a sandwich
ME: the eating part would be easy
ME: but we have to have rapist glasses on at the same time
CAIT: LOL
ME: and the pedophile beard
ME: and the serial killer van


(LATER THAT DAY STILL)


CAIT: argh shes broken
ME: lol nice
CAIT: get the masking tape!!
CAIT: that'll fix her
ME: masking tape fixes anything
CAIT: LOL the office where i do my school work is magic!!!
ME: because??
CAIT: i was sitting there and i was like "hmm... i need a stapler" and i went to the shelf and there was one
CAIT: and then later on i was like hmm i need paperclips and there they were!
ME: woah! crazy.
ME: next time wish for a ice cream or something
CAIT: LOL
ME: be like "i need a kombi van STAT!!"
CAIT: LOL
ME: imagine if one appeared
CAIT: awweeessomme
CAIT: fantastic!!
CAIT: id make it appear outside your place, convenient
ME: with a full tank of gas please
CAIT: lol but i shall keep the keys so you dont break it before we really get to use it
ME: aww so it just gets to sit there!!!!
ME: thats like teasing me!!
CAIT: XD
ME: itd sit there screaming DRIVE MEEEEE
ME: until i eventually break the window and hotwire it
ME: then prolly crash from excitement
CAIT: exactly why you wont get the keys lol
ME: we gotta put cheesey curtins in it
CAIT: OMG we chould get curtians with pictures of cheese on them
ME: cheese or corn
CAIT: both
ME: like shower curtians
ME: we should totally get beads for the back to
ME: but like twenty sets so we can just rip em down when we get bored
CAIT: lol
CAIT: or we could get an awesome like banner and make it into a curtian
ME: we need a banner on the side saying something stupid like "we stop for rhys ifans only"
CAIT: LOL




[[VErSIon 1]]



CAIT: PICK ONE
CAIT: LINUS OR WIDMORE?
ME: linus!!
CAIT: YAY!!!
CAIT: why?
ME: it sounded better?
CAIT: haha
ME: what are they anyway?
CAIT: lol
CAIT: Ben Linus and Charles Widmore from LOST, the two rival group thinys
ME: lol ok then
CAIT: XD
ME: so i voted on something i know nothing about
ME: again.
CAIT: XD
CAIT: excellent
CAIT: welcome to the rest of your life
ME: Welcome? man im already there.
CAIT: NO YOUR NOT
CAIT: you're just a fragmant of imagination
CAIT: by voting you became... whole
ME: who's imagination?
ME: who the fuck would imagine me?
CAIT: some stoned weirdo who likes to draw purple frogs
ME: so im similiar to purple frogs?
ME: or in the same mindset?
CAIT: no, they just like them

[[ VERSION 2 ]]

CAIT: do you know what the magic office gave me today?
ME: a awesome hat like jayne?
CAIT: lol
CAIT: no
ME: pants?
ME: dead guy?
CAIT: like 30 postit notes
ME: mmm post it notes
ME: sexy
CAIT: like full pads
CAIT: yaaa
CAIT: i should write an essay on it and hand it in
CAIT:and say its all i had

[[ Eccles is my ex, Caits too but they like barely went out and i actually broke up with him for her. 2 weeks later he asked me out, fun times. He's a totaly cunt face too ]]

CAIT: you're retarded
ME: why?
CAIT: idk
CAIT: cause your dutch
ME: you wish you were dutch.
ME: then you could wear clogs.
CAIT: i can wear clogs anyway
CAIT: the dutch dont have a rule
ME: i do. only people of dutch descent can wear clogs. its the law
CAIT: no its not
ME: and i bet theyre dutch
CAIT: they're shitty and plastic but they're still clogs
CAIT: no
ME: well the rule applies to proper wooden clogs
CAIT: lol
CAIT: have you got proper wooden clogs?
ME: mini ones
CAIT: but you cant wear them, big foot
ME: eccles has big feet, theyre huge. quite unlike his penis. they keyring ones
CAIT: HAHA
ME: we went from clogs to eccles's penis. strange that
CAIT: yes...
CAIT: i know why
CAIT: Your fetish was that he wore clogs on his penis
ME: my fetish? eccles is the king of fetishes.